Talk to the hand

The sign on the shop had 'Pendross Cybernetic and Bionic' in basic, blocky script. I stood in a shaded doorway across the road from the shop, one who's faded paint and dusty windows seemed to say it hadn't been used in a while. I'd been watching Pendross' door for ten minutes or so, holding my left fist, clenching and unchlenching, in my right hand. I didn't want to cross the street. I didn't want to go in.

I had come to Pendross' because Sachiko had said the owner might be able to tell me something about the prosthetic metal hand I wore on the end of my left arm. This suggestion had come after I had mentioned that I didn't know anything about my prosthesis. This was true. I didn't even know how I'd gotten it.

I have some things about my past I don't remember, that I don't want to remember. Most of my childhood is hazy, at best. It wasn't very pleasant, most of it. I don't have any memory of my mother or father, although I assume I had the usual compliment of both. There were a lot of years of living with different people, and a lot more living on different streets and different squats. A lot of living on scraps, and fighting for leavings out of dumpsters. It's all bits and pieces, without much continuity. And there's a decent stretch of time, I don't know how long, that's pitch black.

I'm pretty sure I got the hand during that period. I think I have might have learned to Step across dimensions somewhere in there, too, although some earlier memories seem to happen in a lot of odd places, so I can't really say. After the black period, the earliest thing I can recall is being escorted out of a place that could have been a laboratory, out to a street in a strange city. The two large individuals escorting me, who looked like men but weren't, took me to a room with a bed, where I slept. When I woke up, I was in a different bed, in a different room, and a different city. I stayed there for two days, mostly sleeping, until I was thrown out by a couple of people who didn't speak any language I could understand.

In the years since, I'd managed to carve out a nice life for myself, and I hadn't thought much about the past. I'd actively avoided it, to be honest. The days before the blackout, they were nothing worth remembering, and there were some things... anyway. The few times I'd tried to think about the blackout period, I'd experienced more than a little panic. Very bad panic. I'd ruined a very nice pair of pants, to be brutally honest.

I knew the hand had its own intelligence. There had been a couple of occasions where it, acting on its own, had saved my life. I thought of it as a friend, albeit one I could barely understand. Having it checked out was logical, though, something I should have done a long time ago. But it had never occurred to me before. I don't know why. Maybe there was a reason for that.

So I stood across from the cyber-shop, metal fist in real hand, fighting down an urge to run.

I looked down at the balled metal fingers. Something else I'd never thought of occurred to me.

“Are you afraid?” I asked, hunched down over the fist. “Is there some reason you don't want me to go in there?” The curled metal fingers loosed, and each one tapped the palm three times. The feeling of panic lessened just slightly. “It is you, isn't it? You're what's making me feel so frightened?”

The feeling vanished, like a soap bubble popping. But that led to a new kind of fear.

“How long... do you do that all the time?” The fingers spread wide, wider than my real fingers could. A point of light appeared on each fingertip, and each curled up until they were pointed at the palm of the hand, making five points of light on the red metal surface. The lights began to move, and letters formed, scrolling across the palm.

'no'

“But sometimes you do, right? You just did!”

'program activates when certain thought patterns emerge. neural feedback is initiated to cause flight response. not under active control. temporary program interrupt in effect'

“You can read my mind?”

'supposition incorrect. alpha waves are scanned for particular pattern. pattern emergence causes sensory interface feedback program activation'

“So, you were built to scare me if I think certain things?”

'supposition incorrect. feedback program non-standard, added as chipset just prior to unit installation on current user'

“You were altered to scare me just before you were put on me? Why? And by who?”

'supposition correct. reasons for alteration: unknown. identity of those responsible for alteration: unknown. warning: program interrupt will become ineffective in 69 seconds'

“Oh, man...”

'to prevent resumption of ill effects due to feedback program, unit must be removed. query: does user wish to remove unit'

“Yes! Now!”

The hand began to cycle through its removal process, releasing its grip and unplugging from the sockets on my forearm. As it finished, I took its weight onto my right hand.

“Is there any way to kill that program? And any others like it you might have in ya?”

'program is chipset. removal of chip from socket 3-SSA will remove program from unit. chip contains only non-pain related response program in unit.'

“Pain related response program?”

'unit can assist user by deadening pain at user request'

“Good to know. If I have the chip pulled, will that do anything to you?”

'unit's efficiency in completing primary function will increase by 1.392%'

“And your primary function is replacing my hand?”

'supposition correct'

“Any particular reason you haven't let me know any of this before now?”

'user made no request for information prior to this point'

“We need to have a long talk sometime soon. How long has it been since you were 'installed'?”

'unit installed on current user 11986355 seconds ago'

“Very informative. Were you on any other users before me?”

'unknown. unit memory begins 2100 seconds before installation on current user.'

“Nothing at all before that?”

'supposition correct. however, memory tags indicate unit memory archived and wiped just prior to installation on current user.'

“That's interesting. And I'm guessing the location of your memory archive is unknown?”

'supposition correct'

“OK. Just to be on the safe side, is there anything this guy might discover by taking a look at you that will get me into trouble?”

'unknown. unit is not familiar with laws of current locale'

“Well then, anything you need him to tend to in ya?”

'unit functioning near optimal, no service currently required.'

“Nine years without a checkup, and you're functioning near optimal, huh? Hardy fella, aren't ya?”

'supposition correct'

I laughed all the way across the street.