The unfortunate gunmen

There was a quiet moment, after the two large men with the equally large weapons had made sure that Jack and I were the only occupants of the small room they'd just burst into. In that quiet moment, I blinked.

Two eyes closed, but three eyes opened.

My third eye, centered low on my forehead just above my eyebrow ridges, combined with my normal sight to show me a world on fire, where the men in front of me were composed of knots or writhing energy, and the walls composed of flowing luminescence. And through the glowing walls, I could see the corridor outside, where three more men, armed like the pair facing me. The rest of the bar was laid out in my sight, as well, although the front bar of Grindlebone's was where my attention focused.

I could see the gold and shining black outline of Grindlebone standing behind the bar, with one of his drink-slingers working beside him. Grindlebone was occupied, working on a drink, but I concentrated, and the other tender looked up in my direction. I could see the confusion swirl around her head, followed by a sudden resolution. The last thing I saw as I blinked again was her reaching over to shake Grin's elbow.

Three eyes closed, two eyes opened.

As always, the world seemed flat and colorless through two eyes. It took me a moment to notice that one of the three men from the hall, and the largest of the five who had crashed our little party, had entered. He stood between the two door-busters, fingering a large weapon holstered at his hip and glaring from eyes that looked out from a narrow band of skin between the long hair that covered his forehead and the thick bushy beard that covered the lower part of his face.

I took a sip of whiskey.

The latest interloper took a heavy step forward, and pointed a grubby finger with a cracked nail at me. “E kou mikino bu teka, Ke'Taono.” Big Hairy jerked his hand back and pointed a thumb at his own face. “Mu tone ra Pooku, ban kobo neer yoot ganaco ghul pinpinko abanen puce loon.”

That was interesting. Grindlebone had outfitted the bar with a couple of systems that should have made Big Hairy's words crystal clear. That he was yelling gibberish, well, that added to an already odd situation. Jack and I exchanged glances. The pieces of black tin that Jack used for eyebrows were raised.

“NOOP TINGO AHHHHHHHHHH!”

That last bit probably wasn't what the big guy meant to say, but while he was bellowing he'd taken another step forward. Grindlebone had evidently activated some of his fine security systems, as the unfortunate fellow was suddenly wreathed in blue energy and seemed to be trying very hard to shake his own teeth out.

The energy field cut off after a few hilarious seconds. Big Hairy rocked back and forth for a moment, smoke rising from his charred hair and beard, before falling over backwards and hitting the floor with a crash. The four of us in the room who were still sensate stared at the prone, smoking figure. Just as that got boring, the floor opened beneath Big Hairy and he vanished into the darkness.

The gunman on the left leaned over and peered into the hole.

When the tentacle shot up out of the hole and wrapped itself the gunman's head, Jack and I barely had time to flinch before he also vanished down into the hole.

The other heavy almost managed to fire his weapon down into the hole before it closed, suddenly and silently. His attention quickly turned to us, which kept him from noticing that another darkness filled trapdoor had opened just above him. He brought the barrel of his weapon up, but it kept rising, against his will, as another tentacle, of the same green as the first, flashed down and took hold of it. The fellow struggled a bit, but his attempt to regain control of the gun was cut short by the appearance of yet another squid-like appendage, which took a secure grip on his skull. Both gun and man vanished upwards.

An incoherent yell pulled my attention to the still open door of the room. One of the two men who had been guarding the hallway appeared to be about to enter the room, I suppose to discuss where his pals had gone, when his face turned to look down the hallway. An comical look of surprise grew on his face, in the second before he was struck by the fast moving body of the last of our party crashers. Both of them flew out of view.

Jack made a tut-tut noise. I finished my whiskey.

A man in a black suit, with shoulders so wide he had to turn sideways to pass through the door and the sloping brow of a Neanderthal stepped into the room.

“Mista Grin'lbone would like to give his apologies for the bother. He would be 'ere to give them himself, but he is supa'vising the intaview with the gennelmen who caused the ruckus. He ast that you be tol' that your tab for the evening is covered.”

Jack and I nodded at each other, and Jack raised his glass of oil to the huge bouncer. Nodding, the bouncer turned sideways and edged back out the door.

The entire sequence of events had taken just over two minutes.